Find and Embrace Who You Truly Are

"Be yourself. Everybody else is taken."

I'm sure you've heard this quote before. The reason I bring it up is it seems to be hard to be yourself.  When I was little, I got my head filled up with a lot of different ideas about who I thought I was. I heard comments from my parents, from my family, from my friends, from my school from work. People I worked with, people I went on dates with - and I always seem to be asking the question, "Who am I? Please! All of you people out here - tell me who I am!"

So as a result of that, I didn't feel like I could make good decisions. I couldn't really trust who I was because I was always trying to be somebody else.

I was watching a documentary on Netflix called "My Octopus Teacher." And there's a scene in there where this octopus swims up to this kelp forest. She's hiding from a predator and she gets into this kelp. She wraps all of these big leaves of kelp all around her. And she's completely hidden. And her little eye just sticks out so she can see what's happening.

I feel like that's what I have done over the course of my life. And some of those layers are about being hurt, and being afraid, and being angry, and a lot of negative self-talk. Telling myself the same old story - you're not good enough, not smart enough. You're making bad decisions, blah, blah, blah.

I want to read a quote from Brené Brown, from "The Gifts of Imperfection."

“People may call what happens at midlife “a crisis,” but it’s not. It’s an unraveling—a time when you feel a desperate pull to live the life you want to live, not the one you’re “supposed” to live. The unraveling is a time when you are challenged by the universe to let go of who you think you are supposed to be, and to embrace who you are.”

As I'm getting older, I realized that I am beginning to shed those layers and uncover my true self. My true, authentic self.

I have another quote from Ernest Holmes who says "We need not move away from ourselves to discover ourselves. What we do is uncover and reveal that which is already concealed at the center of our being." (365 Science of Mind: A Year of Daily Wisdom from Ernest Holmes)

So it's like that octopus wrapped up in all of that kelp. And the gift of getting older is to really look at that and say 'wow, that is not me! That is not who I am!' - start to release a lot of old thoughts and ideas, and really deeply held beliefs about ourselves that really don't serve me anymore.

So how do we do that? How do we get there?

Well, as I said, I was living externally before. I was looking outside of myself to see who I am. What I want to do now is look internally to see who am I and really ask the question: is this belief I have really the truth? Is this really the truth about me?

As I challenged those more and more, I can really say, no, that's not me. That's not me. I can release, and I can accept who I truly am and forgive myself for believing things that weren't true. I can also forgive old hurts and old grudges and a lot of things that cost a lot of energy to carry.

And when I can do that, when I release that burden, I can feel new energy, lighter energy, creative energy, to really focus on who am I, and how can I really live into and present my best self to the world!

So what are some ways to get there? What's the journey?

One would be asking and challenging the beliefs that you hold, that just run you! Those that are just like they're there all the time. You probably think, well, they've always been there, but are they true?

You can journal. You can meditate. You can talk to somebody. You can read great books by Brené Brown. This one is a great one to start with "The Gifts of Imperfection." She's got many more, and she's not the only one. There are lots of books and things out there that help us find who we are.

As we get older, this process becomes easier and easier because we want to use our energy to really inhabit and grow the life that we want for ourselves.

If you want to learn more about self-empowered aging, please click the link below and that'll take you to my free report. Scroll down and click on the blue "Download Now" button.

Thank you for listening.

Dr. Elaine

https://www.drelainestewart.com

This information is for educational purposes only and is not intended to replace the medical advice of your doctor or healthcare provider. Please consult your healthcare provider for advice about a specific medical condition.